


My Protector, My Destroyer

by PSILoveYou



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Anxiety, Cuddling & Snuggling, Established Relationship, Evan is the biggest cuddler, M/M, Panic Attacks, Protective Connor, SMOKING DRUGS, Treebros, Well - Freeform, badass Evan, connor is a good boyfriend, he tries to be, hero!Evan, only as a superhero though, really really bad anxiety, really really bad panic attacks, superhero au, villian!Connor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-05-02 18:54:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 9,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14551197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PSILoveYou/pseuds/PSILoveYou
Summary: Evan Hansen and Connor Murphy are perfectly happy living together in Jade City. They treasure their relationship. Nothing can come between them.But Evan has a secret Connor doesn't know he's Valarian, the city's superhero.And there's something Evan doesn't know about Connor; he hates the hero.When Connor has to clean out his dead father's apartment, he comes across a note about something called the "Valarian" ring and the "Snapwire" ring and with it, the latter ring itself.Connor jumps at the chance to take down Valarian once and for all.He's the one protecting Evan Hansen from everything yet unknowingly also the one who hurts him mercilessly in their battles as Snapwire and Valarian.





	1. Finders Keepers

 

Connor Murphy was in his Father's old apartment, clearing out his stuff. Something that should have been done months ago, when Larry had passed. But Connor had put it off. Not because he couldn't bare being back at this place, with the reminder of Larry's death everywhere. No. Connor hated his father. He always had. Larry Murphy was the reason Connor wanted to murder the world. Connor wanted everyone to pay for his suffering.

Well...everyone except for his angel. Evan. The only person on this planet who treated Connor like a human. The only person Connor loved and who loved him back. Evan, with his crystal blue eyes and angelic smile. He loved Evan with everything he had. Loved the way it felt to hold him. Loved the way Evan hid behind him while anyone else was present, the way Evan relied on him, the way he purred in his sleep, how it seemed like all Evan wanted was to be cuddled by him. Yeah. Connor was madly in love with Evan Hansen and there was nothing anybody could do about it.

Connor realized he was smiling stupidly at his thoughts. He shook it off and focused on clearing out the apartment. He tossed everything on the dresser into the trash bag he was holding, the sooner he finished with this the sooner he could get back to Evan, in his own apartment.

The bedroom was just about finished. Connor was just reaching for the last thing, shoved all the way in the back of the closet. He pulled it out. It was a metal box, about the size of his palm. Connor opened it, revealing a folded piece of paper and a ring.

He unfolded the paper curiously and read the scribbled words:

_The Indigo Project:_

_The "Valerian" Ring ø_

Valerian. That was the name of Jade City's superhero. Valerian went head to head with every super villain he faced, always coming out on top. He was beloved by the city, and it made Connor sick. Valerian wasn't a hero. He was the reason Zoe was imprisoned.

He continued reading.

_Powers and ability: whomever wears this ring possesses the powers of crystal manipulation and holographic projection_  
_Suit operation: the suit will automatically appear and fit the person wearing the ring_

Connor's breathing started to become faster, like Evan before he begins to have a panic attack.

Holographic projection? Crystal manipulation? These were Valerian's superpowers. Valerian drew his powers from wearing some magical ring?

_The "Snapwire" Ring §_  
_Powers and ability: whomever wears this ring possesses the power of electricity and self-healing_  
_Suit operation: the suit will automatically appear and fit the person wearing the ring_

Connor's heart pounded in his chest. He examined the ring in the box. It was a silver band, no thicker than a wedding ring, with a small § symbol engraved into it. Connor picked the ring up with shaky hands and slid it onto his finger.

 

Immediately, Connor's body was covered tightly in a black, carbon fiber material. A suit. Connor looked at himself in the his dad's mirror above the dresser.

He was dressed in a suit identical to Valerian, even the mask that covered his eyes was the same. But there was a white glow embedded in the fabric, lining down the entirety of the suit in patterns that complimented each of his muscles. Now this was different. The Snapwire suit had white glow-lining while Valerian's was a bluish-purple.

Connor admired himself. Blue and white electricity crackled down his arms excitedly. He smirked.

 

This was it! Now he could take down Valerian himself instead of waiting and watching other villains fail to do so.

He could make Valerian hurt and suffer. He could ruin him.

Connor laughed to himself.

 


	2. Too Far

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does anybody want to beta-read this fic?

Three Days Later:

Evan was curled up on the sofa flipping through channels on the TV. It was about 6:00 am but Evan had woken up just as he heard the door to the apartment open and close and a note from Connor saying he'd be back soon. 

Evan's heart had started beating faster in his chest as he scrambled out of bed to get his phone. He was nervous about where Connor was going. What if he goes somewhere sketchy? Or gets hurt? What if a super villian gets ahold of him and holds him hostage? He dialed Connor's number hastily.

A phone had started ringing on Connor's side of the bed. Evan looked over and saw that Connor had left it. He hung up and sat on the couch in the living room. He was too on edge to go back to sleep.

He stopped at the news channel and placed the remote down. The movement caused the the half-zipped hoodie of Connor's to slide off his shoulder. The sweatshirt was huge on him.

Suddenly the news remote switched to footage of some kind of attack taking place. Evan stared at the screen a little longer and recognized the buildings in the background to be of Jade City. Electric waves pulses throughout the road, all coming from one person. He tuned out the news reporter as he examined the man. He was wearing almost the same exact suit that Evan had! How could that be? 

He watched as people ran from this super villain, screaming in terror.

Evan shot up from the sofa. Then everything just went black. The lights, the tv, the buildings outside the window. Everything.

Evan dug into his pocket and pulled out his ring, the one his father gave him when he was seven. As he left Evan and his mom. 

Evan slipped on the ring and his suit immediately covered him. He threw open the window and into the pitch black night. The power was out for the whole city. What did this man do?

He formed crystal beneath his feet shooting him forward on a skyward path as the crystal extended rapidly out in front of him. He bent his knees and rode the crystal almost like a surfboard. Except, this was much much faster. He never really knew how fast he could ride his "crystal paths" but he knew it was faster than a speeding car. The crystal disintegrated the second his feet stopped touching them, making it look like a collapsing beam-like structure.

Valerian could soon see where the attack was coming from since the electricity gave off a bright light against the blackened city, though the sun was beginning to rise.

Valerian continued speeding forward. The man had hostages. A lot of hostages. Cars were flipped over, the GPD took cover behind a line of smashed cabs. The man was about to attack them when he turned to see Valerian about 100 feet away. So much for a surprise entrance. If only he could get better at that holographic projection thing, but he only managed to do it once.

The man smiled as he saw him, "I've been waiting for you to show up!" He hollered in a sweet tone

Chills ran through Valerian, "Who are you!" He cried out to the man  
He laughed. Hard. Valerian was growing more uneasy "How do you have that suit!"

The man laughed even more and used his electric powers to skyrocket up and levitate to about halfway up the height of a building. Valerian followed, his crystal shooting him upwards so that they were face to face.

"You really don't know?" Valerian looked at him confused. The man realized he was clueless, "My name is Snapwire!" He announced

Snapwire was surprised his enemy didn't understand. Had he not known there was another ring? He tapped his ring so Valerian could see it. 

"Where did you get that!" 

"Doesn't matter. What matters is that I'm going to kill you" 

Snapwire shot his electricity at the crystal-tower Valerian was standing on. Valerian's guard was down and couldn't block it in time. The electricity disintegrated the crystal and sent Valerian free falling. He tried making more crystal to support his fall but it just kept getting disintegrated by Snapwire's blasts. 

Valwrian hit the ground pretty hard. He cried out in pain at the impact. Valerian tried to push himself up but it only caused more pain to shoot through his body. He whimpered and collapsed back down.

He took labored breaths in and out. Snapwire cackled as he made his way toward Valerian. 

Valerian tried getting up again, causing him more pained sounds from out of his mouth, but it was in vain. Snapwire was right in front of him now. Out of options, Valerian extended his arm out toward Snapwire, a sharp crystal protruding from it until it was embellished into Snapwire's stomach. Snapwire screamed in pain as blood started spreading from the wound. Valerian hadn't wanted it to come to this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment! They give me validation. Also don't forget to leave kudos? Anyway, let me know if you're interested in beta-ing this. Also I know AO3 doesn't let you put a cover art on docs but if you want to make art for this, I'll gladly add it in an update.


	3. What we fight for

SnapWire stumbled back. He pulled the crystal sphere from his torso, groaning in pain as he did so.

Valerian could only watch from where he was lying on the ground, mouth hanging agape. What was he doing?

Snapwire knew he had lost this battle. But he hadn't yet lost the war. Valerian didn't yet know about his self-healing powers, and he was going to use that to his advantage so that next time, Valerian wouldn't even know what hit him.

He tuned into the city's electricity, turning it back on. The lights all came on at once, causing Valerian to have to shield his eyes. Snapwire used this as his chance to escape. He connected to the thrumming electricity, binding with it, thus allowing him to travel through the electric current.

In almost no time, Snapwire found he was home in the living room. He collapsed on the couch, letting his wounds heal. It appeared Evan wasn't awake yet, thank god. 

It was about seven thirty in the morning now, Connor had left at about six. He sighed contently as his stab wound mended itself back together until it was like it was never there.

Connor took the ring off and he was instantly back in his normal clothes. He stuffed the ring in his back pocket and went to the bedroom where he had left a sleeping Evan. 

When he opened the door Connor was not expecting to see Evan collapse into bed. Hadn't he already been asleep? Why was the window open? 

Connor didn't bother to shut it as he crawled into bed next to Evan, "Ev, baby," he said softly as he gave the smaller boy a gentle shake

Evan cried out in pain and his eyes shot open. Connor pulled away as if he had been burned. Did he just hurt Evan? Oh god...

Evan whimpered as he cradled his shoulder where Connor had nudged him. 

"Evan, did I hurt you?" Connor asked frantically

He wanted to help Evan but he didn't know how. He didn't want to hurt him again. He didn't want to touch him. Maybe he was still too riled up from fighting Valarian. Oh god, oh god. And Evan was in pain because of it.

"N-no" he said in a shaky voice "I just, it just, not you're f-fault. I fell out of bed this morning. On, on, m-my shoulder."

Evan was dressed in Connor's black hoodie. It was way too big on him. He was also wearing only boxer-briefs. He looked adorable.

Connor let himself grin a bit and he leaned over Evan's body, giving him a gentle kiss. "Try to be more careful, baby,"

Evan nodded in agreement

"C'mon, let's get up, I'll make some coffee"

Evan groaned in distaste and pulled the covers over his head, "No!" He whined

Connor laughed and pulled the covers back down. He leaned back over Evan and picked him up with ease. Evan wrapped his legs around Connor's waist and his arms around his neck. He closed his eyes as he buried his face into Connor's neck.

"I love you," Connor whispered to him as he walked them into the kitchen

"I love you too" he mumbled sleepily

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Questions? Comments? Comments and kudos give me validation!  
> Sorry if this chapter is awful, I have so much stuff I'm dealing with right and my anxiety is so bad I've barely gotten any sleep for like a week. So I'm like half awake. I'm sorry.


	4. Side Effects

It was the next night that Connor decided to attack the city again. He slipped on the ring, and the suit covered him instantly. Connor was about to connect himself to the electric current thrumming through the city when he heard the jingle of keys coming from the building's hallway. Keys started turning the lock on the door. Evan was home. 

Connor quickly slipped off the ring and shoved it in his pocket, just as Evan opened the door.

Evan looked completely drained. His shoulders sagged, and there was no light in his eyes. He didn't smile at Connor as he entered into the apartment. 

"Ev?" He asked worriedly

Evan didn't respond, he just made his way over to the couch and collapsed on it.

Connor followed and sat next to him, pulling Evan close and holding him.

"What happened? What's wrong?" He asked softly

"Tired" he muttered

Connor was a little off today too. He got an alert from his news app on his phone that a villain named RedBird had gone head to head with Valarian. He had spent the whole day at his work desk following the news updates on it. RedBird ended up defeated. Connor was glad. He wanted to take down Valarian himself.

"Me too, baby,"

Any plans of fighting Valarian tonight had been ditched. He was staying here with Evan. 

Connor kissed him slowly. Evan smiled, kissing back with the same gentle tenderness. 

Connor broke the kiss as his stomach growled, "m' hungry"

Evan nodded, "Pizza?"

"We just had pizza on Tuesday!" he exclaimed a bit too loudly

Evan tensed, "You're right, I'm sorry."

Evan tried to pull himself free of Connor's grip. He knew he had scared him, or made him anxious at the very least.

Connor pulled him closer so that Evan was sitting in his lap, his back pressed against Connor's chest. He kissed Evan's cheek.

"Hey, baby, no. Pizza sounds great."

Evan kissed him gratefully. Connor knew it wasn't because getting pizza that he was relieved about, but that Connor wasn't mad. 

Connor got mad a lot. But never, in all their years of dating had he actually taken his anger out on Evan. Until this one time last year.

Connor and Evan were having a disagreement over Evan's 'friendship' with Jared Kleinman. Connor had never liked him. He was telling Evan how he was an abusive friend and that Evan needed to stop talking to him. Evan responded that Jared was his only friend and they've been friends since they were little children. He thought Jared was a great friend.

Connor had eventually lost his temper, cornering Evan and screamed: "Then why don't you let him fuck you instead then!"

Evan had whimpered and pressed himself against the wall. He started crying, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry, Connor!" He sobbed

Connor's anger had immediately sizzled out as he looked at the smaller boy. "Oh, baby, I didn't mean that. I'm so sorry. I'm not angry anymore." Connor opened up his arms, offering him a hug "Baby, come here" he said softly

Evan didn't move. It had taken a while to make up after that. Evan had been scared of him for the next few days after. He ended up giving up contact with Jared even though Connor said it was fine if he didn't. He was glad he did though. He only said it had been fine because of where the disagreement had led them previously. Evan and Connor fixed the trust and sense of safety that Connor's outburst had ruined. But even to this day, Connor could tell Evan was still sometimes nervous around him. And it broke his heart.

Connor stood up from where he and Evan were cuddled on the couch. He called their favorite pizza place, Super Pizza and ordered delivery.

The rest Connor and Evan's night was perfect.

...

Evan woke up the next morning with his head cuddled on top of Connor's chest. Connor held him firmly, like he was afraid Evan would disappear.

Connor was still sleeping. He looked so peaceful when he slept. Not a care or stress in the world. Evan smiled, giving Connor a soft, long kiss.

Connor's eyes opened and he kissed back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kind of hate this, so let me know if you actually want me to continue it?


	5. Beck(oning)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry I took so long to update. A lot has been going on and my anxiety has gotten even worse. And yeah. I'm sorry. , I'm sorry, okay I'm going to stop talking cause I'm really anxious right now sorry

Evan collapsed onto the couch. Thank god Connor wasn't home. He had cleaned the blood off his body before he entered the apartment in case he dropped anywhere but his body was still hurting everywhere. Evan was still trying to catch his breath from the newest battle with Snapwire. He's been trying to defeat the villain for a month now but it just seemed to be getting harder and harder. Snapwire had escaped almost completely unharmed this time. 

Connor smiled smugly to himself as he walked down the apartment hallway. He had been so close to defeating Valarian. He was a breath away from knocking him unconscious which would have left him completely in Connor's mercy. He was getting closer and closer. Maybe it would be next time.

Five Years Ago

"Zoe? Stop! What's going on! Let go of her! What's happening!" Connor screamed as he watched Zoe get handcuffed by the Jade City Police. 

Connor tried to get to her, shoving his way through the line of police that crowded his sister's apartment. He had almost reached her when he was suddenly being held back. Connor fought and screamed and tried to be free but it was no use. 

"Stop! Stop! Please!" He screamed to the person holding onto him. He turned back to see their face and it was none other then the Valarian. "Let me go! Please! Let me go! You did this! You did this to her! You son of a bitch! I'm going to fucking kill you! Get off of me!"

But Valarian stood still. Not saying a word. The bastard even had the nerve to look sad. Like he cared what happened to Zoe. 

The police took Zoe away and finally Valarian let go of Connor. He turned around to hurt the 'hero' but Valarian was already gone. Connor screamed. 

That was the last time he ever saw Zoe. Nobody would ever even told him why.

Connor reached the door to his apartment and pulled out his keys. His body was already completely healed, thanks to the power that his suit had. Connor was giddy over the thought that Valarian didn't get that for himself. He had to heal like a normal being. 

He put the keys in and twisted the lock, opening up the door. All the lights were off except for the kitchen light. It was really a very cozy scene. 

"Ev?" Connor called softly 

Connor noticed Evan curled up on the couch as the smaller boy turned his body to smile at him. 

"Hey, turtle" he said 

Connor felt himself smile at the nickname. He really needed to come up with one for Evan. 

Connor went over to him and picked him up gently, about to kiss him, when Evan cried out in pain.

"Evan?" Connor asked, horrified

Connor was brought back to when this happened last month. And then he was reminded of how Evan seemed to be having more and more days of exhaustion over the last few weeks. 

Evan buried his face into Connor's neck. 

"Evan, what's going on?" 

"Nothing"

"Evan. You need to tell me right now."

The smaller boy tensed in his arms, "No. Not right now, I mean? You're not, you're not there yet. You wouldn't be able to, to forgive me" 

"Baby, what are you talking about?"

Evan didn't respond. Connor looked at him to see why but he was already asleep. Connor sighed. Whatever it was, Connor hoped waiting was the right thing to do. He needed to learn to pick his battles. And he was going to start here.

The next morning, Evan hurried to get ready and quickly left the apartment before Connor could even wake up. He has his light washed skinny jeans on and Connor's favorite black hoodie. It was cold out but Evan only had a hat and gloves. He forgot his jacket again.

He walked fast through the busy streets, his nose bright red from the cold. Evan really needed a coffee but he didn't want to have to order it by himself. His anxiety was bad enough today already. 

Finally he got to the right building and the door man opened the door for him. Evan was hit with a blast of warmth as he entered the lobby. 

The elevator seemed to not be moving at all. Maybe it was just Evan's nerves. Too slowly, the numbers rose 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 until finally it reached the ninth floor and it dinged open.

He dashed down the hall to apartment 9H and rang the door bell. Quickly, the door was opened.

"Alana" Evan smiled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this story is crap


	6. Digging A Hole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy end of May or early June!!!!!!

Alana Beck opened the door to find Evan out of breath and flushed from the cold weather. 

"Evan?" Alana gasped, surprised 

Evan gave her an awkward smile, "h-hi I, I'm, well you see I, I have a um, a problem"

-  
Evan and Alana sat comfortably on her couch. Alana leaned back into the cushions, relaxed and at peace while Evan was at the edge of his seat, sipping nervously from a cup of tea Alana had made to warn him up. 

"Spill" she demanded in a fake commanding tone

Evan sat down the mug on the coffee table and took a deep breath, "well, you see, c-Connor um, Connor's been um noticing the, the wounds and um just um the affect I-it's been taking- the toll it's been taking on me?"

Alana sighed "well, it was bound to happen eventually. Are you going to tell him you're Valarian?"

"No!" Evan said too loudly "I-I mean, should I?" He peered up at her nervously 

"After what happened with Zoe?"

Evan whined and put his head in his hands "I-I didn't have a choice!"

Alana looked away from him sadly "I know," she said quietly "It had to be done."

Luckily Evan wasn't looking because a tear fell down her cheek. She wiped it away just before Evan looked back up. 

"Did it though?" He asked 

Then more tears came, rolling down her cheeks before she could stop them. 

"Yeah," Alana whispered "it did." Her voice cracked on each word

Evan nodded stiffly, "okay" he whispered back

Sometimes Evan wasn't sure who took Zoe's capture the hardest; Connor or Alana. 

Evan scooted next to Alana, wrapping his arms around her neck lovingly. Alana calmed herself and hugged him back. 

"Then i-I won't tell him"

-

Jared Kleinman was walking home from work that night. God, he hated his job. He was always so exhausted at the end of the day and it seemed like he could never get enough sleep. 

He yawned but tried to stay awake enough to function his walk home. He needed some caffeine in his system.

The streets were crowded even though it was nine o'clock at night, but that's how it always was in Jade city. Jared turned the corner on the block, not really watching where he was going, and smacked into someone. That someone fell to the ground and groaned.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going, here let me help you up," Jared offered out his hand

Jared could see now it was a boy, though he hadn't seen his face yet, until he looked up at him anxiously and good god, it was Evan fucking Hansen!

"Evan!" Jared gasped 

Evan looked panicked and scrambled to his feet before backing away a little. "I, I, um, I have to g-go,"

Evan turned to go but Jared grabbed his arm "No, wait! It's been years, acorn, let's at least go for some coffee."

Evan bit his lip and nodded dubiously, not really sure how to say no.

-

"So tell me, acorn, why the fuck would you stop talking to me?" Jared asked

He had been wondering for years, never quite able to forget Evan abandoning their friendship.

They were sitting across from each other at a nearby coffee house that Jared liked.

Evan scratched at the sides of his cup and mumbled something too quietly.

"Have you still not learned how to speak up?" Jared asked, wincing at his own harshness

Evan looked away in embarrassment and Jared felt worse. He decided to change the subject.

"How's the school shooter?"

Damnit, Kleinman!

Evan pursed his lips and didn't respond. They stayed in silence for a moment, "I-i should go"

Evan picked up his coffee and stood up.

"'Kay" Jared dead-panned, looking straight ahead

He just fucked up his one chance to get his best friend back. Jared didn't move as Evan hurried out the door.

-  
Connor sighed, relieved when he heard the keys turning in the door.

Evan walked in carrying a cup of coffee and Connor lept from the couch to pick him up. 

"Hi, sunshine" he smiled up at Evan 

"Hi, turtle" Evan giggled

"Can I have some coffee?"

"Only, only if you give me a k-kiss"

Connor smiled wider and set Evan back down so he could kiss him properly. They broke only because they were both out of breath.

"You did answer any of my messages. I was so worried. You left before I even woke up." Connor gave him another quick kiss and then waited for a reply.

"I was just, just um at Alana's and you know how long it takes to um g-get there and we um went out to lunch, and, and stuff?"

He leaned his head into Connor's chest. Connor looked away bitterly. Alana...Zoe. Alana always reminded him of Zoe. His mood turned sour instantly. He broke away from Evan. 

"I'm going to bed"

Evan nodded and sat down on the couch as the bedroom door closed. He knew Connor needed his space right then so he didn't join him for another hour or so that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So thanks for reading this shitty story? I don't know why you are? But thanks? 
> 
> Are you happy or sad that jared's back?


	7. Unraveling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evan's anxiety is at it's max

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm back. I'm so sorry this took so long :(

Valerian screamed in pain, falling to his knees as SnapWire shot a wave of electricity through him. The city lights were flickering on and off slowly from all the currents SnapWire was sending out.

He made his way to Valerian, kicking him in the stomach so that he doubled over on the ground. SnapWire climbs on top of him, pinning him down. He grabs him chin, forcing Valerian to look at him.

That’s when he notices his rapid breathing and the small whimpering noises he’s making. 

Valerian, Snapwire noticed, had been off today. Something was wrong but he couldn’t exactly pinpoint what it was, but now he knew: Valerian had anxiety to some degree and today, it was a lot worse.

Evan had days like this, Connor knew. Today was one of them. Ever since Evan had woken up, he’d been quieter and even more timid. Anxiety’s a bitch like that. Connor knew not to start even just a disagreement during these days. It wouldn’t be fair.

He looked down at Valerian who was trembling underneath his grip. He’s seen other villians have Valerian in a position like this, but Valerian never seemed to panic like he was doing now. There was something so Evan about this behaviour. 

Snapwire could’ve ended it all right now. Kill him once and for all. But he doesn’t. Because Valerian barely even fought back today. He thought about Evan when he’s like this. Connor could have the smallest annoyance about something and Evan wouldn’t even try to defend himself. He would just blame himself and try to fix whatever happened that had been bugging Connor.

He couldn’t do it. Not today. It wouldn’t be right. Connor wouldn’t be able to look at Evan the same way knowing he had taken advantage of someone’s anxiety.

He got off of Valerian, standing up, “Another time. This wasn’t a fair fight”

All the pedestrians who had the grit to watch the fight from a distance were shocked. 

SnapWire didn’t wait around to see Valerian’s reaction. He took off, traveling through the City’s electrical currents to his home, taking off the ring immediately.

Evan hadn’t gotten home from work yet which is weird since he should’ve come back at least an hour ago. 

Connor tried to text and call but there’s no response. He waited on the couch for him worriedly.

The door opened forty minutes later, revealing Evan who was a trembling mess. Connor sprung from the couch, about to hug him but Evan scrambled back into the hallway, terrified. 

“Evan? Baby, it’s just me. I’m not going to hurt you” he said, trying to mask the hurt in his voice

Connor had been so careful with Evan today, even more so than he always is. He tried so hard not to do anything to scare him. He hadn’t even made a snarky comment about anything.

Yet here Evan was, absolutely frightened to death. What had Connor done?’

No, he remembered. It was just really bad today. It wasn’t something Connor had done.

“Have you taken your pill?” he asked

Evan gave him a small nod. Connor sighed and took a little step toward him.

Wrong move.

Evan took off running down the hall. Where on earth would he go? Outside? No, he couldn’t. The busy city would just freak him out more. But Evan wasn’t thinking about that. He was just trying to get away.

Connor hated what he was about to but he didn’t really have any other choice. He ran after him, catching up before Evan could even reach the elevator.

He grabbed him so he couldn’t run and covered his mouth as he screamed. The last thing Connor needed was another reason for the neighbors to call him abusive. And he wasn’t. He knew he wasn’t. It just seemed like he was because Evan is, well...Evan, who followed Connor at his heels and was scared of everything.

He didn’t let go of Evan or uncover his mouth as he walked them slowly back into their apartment. Evan wouldn’t stop trying to scream and resist.

Connor sits them on the couch, Evan in his lap. Connor doesn’t move an inch so that he wouldn’t scare him even more.

A few minutes go by of this before Evan must finally realize he was safe because he went still and silent. Connor takes his hand away from his mouth and released his grip on him. Evan didn’t move away.

Connor whispered soft, gentle assurances in his ear, mulling over what just happened. Evan had never done something like that before, even when he was having some of his worst panic attacks. What the hell was going on...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting a one-shots series. Leave me requests in the comments for a chapter!


	8. You Promised Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Connor smokes some drugs

Evan woke up in Connor’s arms the next morning. He untangled himself and got out of bed, not giving a sleeping Connor a kiss like he usually did when he woke up before him. It was nothing Connor did, Connor was nothing but amazing to him constantly. Evan just needed some space, he supposed.

Honestly, he didn’t really know why he felt so on-his-guard around him. It only started when he came back home last night. Last night…

The memories came rushing back and he froze, unable to move.

How easily he had been beaten.  
How SnapWire pinned him down.  
How he was entirely at his mercy  
How scared he had been…

“Ev? Evan?” Connor’s frightened voice broke through his flashback

Evan turned and looked at him, unable to say a word. Connor was sitting up in bed, his hair a mess but his eyes wide awake, despite having just woken up. He crawled to the edge of the bed near where Evan was standing.

“Evan, I’m scared. You’re scaring me. What’s going on? I feel like I’m losing you. Am I losing you? Talk to me, please!” Connor begged

Evan frowns sadly. He wanted to tell him everything. Get rid of this goddamned secret he’d been hiding for too long. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t let Connor know. He wasn’t ready.

“I’m, uh, going on a walk,” Evan said hurriedly

He pulled on Connor’s hoodie and a pair of leggings as he rushed to the door. Connor shot out of bed after him.

“Evan, wait, please,”

“Stop, Connor, I’m sorry. I just need space right now,” Evan slammed the door shut behind him, not meaning for it to be that loud but he was in such a rush to get out

Connor didn’t go after him. He just sighed and rubbed his face, trying to hold back the tears. Where did they go wrong? Connor couldn’t tell, but recently, their relationship seemed so...broken. Evan was so broken. Did he do that to him?

He needed a distraction and fast, but Valerian...Connor felt like he should give it another few days before he messed with him again. Could he wait that long though?

He paced around the apartment for a while before he pulled out the weed. He promised Evan he would stop but he’d been sneaking out and getting high behind his back anyway. But Connor couldn’t leave the apartment. He wanted to be here for when Evan came back. Fuck it if Evan got mad when he came home to smell it. Connor needed it.

So there he was, sitting on the couch, smoking his pot when Evan opened the door. He turned around to face him. Evan was smiling at him, holding a bouquet of daisies, Connor’s favorite.

Shit.

“Connor, I-I’m really sorry for, um, how I acted last night a-and for just leaving this morning-” he cut himself off as his smile disappeared, “Why does it smell like weed in here?” he asked nervously

Connor pressed his lips together. This was going to be bad.

Evan came over to stand in front of him, dropping the bouquet on the counter as he passed by it. His eyes scanned Connor until they fell on the joint in his hand. He let out a gasp and his eyes widened, looking back up at Connor.

“You’ve been smoking again?” 

But there was no anger in his voice like Connor had thought there would be. No, it was filled with something much worse: heartbreak.

Connor couldn’t look at him anymore so he just turned his head away. He was too ashamed to respond.

“H-how long?” Connor could hear him crying now

He shook his head, knowing it would only make things worse if Evan knew. He would be so disappointed.

“How long, Connor!” he screamed through his sobs

Connor looked back up in surprise. This was the last reaction he thought Evan would have. It was so unlike him to yell like this.

Evan was a mess, sobbing hysterically. His eyes were red and puffy and his face was soaked in tears. But still, Evan was waiting for an answer.

“A year and a half” Connor choked out.

To be fair, Connor had barely smoked since he became SnapWire. Fighting Valerian was his escape. But now he couldn’t do that at the moment so it was back to weed.

Evan started pulling at his hair, “Oh my god”

“Evan…” Connor got up and walked towards him

“You promised me”

“I know but-”

“You promised me!”

Connor dropped his gaze and Evan ran into the bedroom, locking the door.

Damnit, Connor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry, it's depressing, I know. Please don't hate me.


	9. Pick Up the Pieces

He needed an escape. It had been days since Evan caught him smoking and he still wouldn’t even look at Connor. Evan locked himself in their room whenever they were both home and Connor had taken to sleeping on the couch. He didn’t have the heart to continue smoking. In fact, he threw away the rest of his stash the night Evan found out. He hated the part of himself telling him to keep the weed instead.

 

Four days after, Connor couldn’t take it anymore. He gave Valerian enough time already, now he would kill him. He left a note on the counter, telling Evan how sorry he was and that he was going out and would be back soon.

 

He slipped out of the apartment and slid on the ring. Connor took a deep breath and connected to the electricity, traveling to the park in the middle of the city. Evan loved this park, it was the only place in the city where there were trees. 

 

He didn’t want to destroy the nature, Evan would be crushed, so he transports himself to the center, where there’s a large concrete clearing with a fountain in the middle. Park benches lined the edges of it. 

 

Snapwire sent out a wave of electricity, sparks crackling everywhere.

 

Pedestrians screamed and tried to run but he screamed, “Run, and I kill you!”

 

The people froze in place, hugging whoever they were with for dear life. Some of them shook in fear as they looked up at him. Nobody moved except for Connor who stood up on the edge of the fountain as electricity pulsed down his arms.

 

He saw somebody videoing, probably sending this to the police of the news. Good. He was pretty sure that’s how Valerian knew there was an attack.

 

Snapwire waited for Valerian, five minutes, ten minutes… Valerian would always show up by now. Unless...unless he was already here and was too scared to face him...

 

“Valerian!’ he screamed and walked up to a teenage girl, putting her in a head-lock. She screamed and tried to get away but Snapwire was too strong, “Show yourself or she dies!”

 

There’s a moment where nothing happens and Snapwire started to doubt him being here. He waited a little longer, becoming more hesitant. 

 

Was Connor going to have to kill this girl? He never planned on anyone else getting harmed. He only wanted to kill Valerian. Maybe he should just get out of here.

 

But then he saw him, Valerian, stepping out from behind a tree. Connor held the girl tighter, as a warning to him. Valerian didn’t move forward. He didn’t attack Snapwire or anything. He stayed back.

 

“What are you doing!” Snapwire demanded, shoving the girl to the ground, “Get over here!”

 

Valerian ducked his head. All Connor could thing was  _ Evan Evan Evan. Don’t hurt him. _

He was just like Evan. He was scared and anxious and…

 

_ No _ .  _ Don’t think like that. This isn’t Evan. Don’t compare a monster to an angel. _

 

Connor snapped himself out of his thoughts and focused back on Valerian. He was going to kill him. He’d already had this much of an effect on him, seeing how frightened of him he was, he could do this. He could kill him,

 

“Are you just going to let these people die?” Snapwire sneered

 

That got Valerian to move. He began walking towards him, slowly and hesitantly.

 

“Why are you doing this?” Valerian asked, getting closer

 

“Because,” Snapwire said, not sure why he was even giving him and answer, “You took her away,”

 

“Her?”

 

Snapwire didn’t want to give him any more information. He shot a bolt of electricity at Valerian but he dodges it.

 

“Who?” he pressed on, “Your g-girlfriend?”

 

Valerian formed a shield-like crystal attached to his arm that he used to block all of Snapwire’s attacks but it was starting to crack. He launched sharp spheres of crystal at Valerian and one would have hit him in the head had he ducked a second later.

 

Since Snapwire was distracted, people began scrambling to take cover from the fight. He didn’t care about them. He had what he wanted.

 

“NO!” he screamed at Valerian but he still didn’t say who

 

“I’m sorry,” Valerian dodges another bolt of electricity but it hit his shield and it shattered, “I don’t know who you’re t-talking about but, if she got imprisoned it was for a g-good reason, I swear,”

 

Fury erupted within Connor’s chest and he put everything he had into the next bolt of electricity. Valerian stumbled back, letting out a yelp, “LIAR! She was a good person!”

 

“It had to be done!” Valerian shot another crystal sphere, this one grazed Snapwire’s side and he grunted

 

“You don’t even care, do you? About the people left behind after you take someone away! You don’t care about how broken they are because of what  _ you  _ did to them. What kind of freak are you?”

 

Valerian froze, “I…”

 

Snapwire stopped too. He wasn’t in the mood for a fight anymore. He’d been fighting enough as it was with Evan. And this conversation just made him feel so...empty.

 

“See ya around,” he sneered and made his escape

  
  


Evan was home by the time Connor got back. He was curled up on the couch watching the news. It was a recap of the fight that just happened between Valerian and Snapwire. He didn’t look up when Connor came in but he didn’t go and lock himself in the bedroom either. This was,..progress?

 

“Hey…” Connor said cautiously

 

Evan sighed and flicked off the T.V., he turned to look up Connor for the first time in days.

 

Evan didn’t exchange the greeting. He bit his cheek and stayed silent for a moment.

 

“Connor…” Evan hesitated, trying to choose his next words carefully, “Would you...would you ever want to, to h-hurt me?”

 

Connor’s eyes went wide and he moved closer to Evan, “Oh my god, no! Never!” 

 

His heart started thumping in his chest. 

 

Evan just looked away.

 

“Why would you ever ask that?”

 

Evan didn’t respond.

 

Connor’s ears started ringing the way they do when he’s angry. Except he’s not angry. He’s scared. Terrified.

 

“Am I making you feel unsafe? Have I...is it my anger? I’m trying so hard. I’m doing everything my therapist tells me to do. I...I- have I done something? Tell me, Evan, I’ll make it better. I can fix this. Please.”

 

Still Evan didn’t say a word. Connor watched him frantically as he picked at his gray hoodie. Evan was wearing his own sweatshirt today. Not Connor’s. He always wore Connor’s hoodie…

 

Evan stopped touching the hoodie and hid face in his hands.

 

“Evan?” He crouched down in front of where Evan was sitting on the couch and looked up at the smaller boy, “Is this about the weed? I’m not going to go back to what I was in high school. I’m not that person anymore. I’ve gotten better. I don’t…” he trailed off as he noticed the shaking of Evan’s chest

 

He was crying.

 

“Evan,” Connor’s voice cracked, “Look at me,”

 

Evan peered at him through his fingers. Connor pulled his hands away from his face gently.

 

“It’s just...what if I, what if I did something and so you hated me for it? What if I got Zoe locked up? You would hate me…,” he put his face back in his hands

 

Connor sighed, realizing what this was about. “You were watching the fight on the news.”

 

Evan nodded.

 

“And you’re worried of what Snapwire said about someone he knew getting locked up,”

 

He nodded again.

 

“Ev, I love you so fucking much. Don’t worry about Snapwire and Valerian, okay?”

 

“Okay,”

 

Connor got up and sat down on the couch, pulling Evan into his lap. He kissed him all over his face, on his cheeks, his forehead, his eyelids, the tip of his nose, and his lips. He missed Evan in the past few days.

 

“I love you too, by the way,” Evan said quietly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you wondering what Evan's middle name is, it's actually Evan. His real name is Mark because of his stupid dad.  
> So the Dear Evan Hansen novel is coming out on monday. I posted the first chapter, cause, who can wait until monday? Not me.


	10. My Secrets and Your Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evan speaks his mind, kind of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is so short sorry, they'll be more action soon.

The rest of the night had gone fine. Connor held Evan until the smaller boy fell asleep,and then moved them into the bedroom. It was the first time in days Connor had slept in his bed and with Evan. Maybe this low point was finally coming to an end.

Nope. Apparently not, because Connor was awakened the next morning by hushed voices. He opened his eyes and found that the other side of the bed is empty. Who else was here with Evan? Alana maybe?

He got up, and crept into the hallway, careful not to be a sound.

“...I just thought, y’know, I missed you and we had a nice time the other day-” says a voice

“No!” he hears Evan whisper-yell, “You can’t be here! We can, it’s fine if we hang out, just not around him. I-I don’t want him to know. He doesn’t like you.”

Connor narrowed his eyes, hiding behind the corner as he listens to the voices talk in the entryway. Who the fuck was this guy?

“Oh my god, Evan, just let me in already. The freak will just have to deal with me.”

Freak?

Jared Kleinman, it had to be him.

Connor revealed himself and cleared his throat irritatedly. Unfortunately, he was right. It was Jared.

Both boys turned around at the noise.

“C-Connor!” Evan gasped at the same time Jared smirked and said “Murphy,”

Connor just stared at the scene, unsure how to respond. Jared took this as an opportunity to shove past Evan into the apartment but Evan paid him no attention. He was too busy looking at Connor like a little kid who had just been caught doing something bad.

“Connor, I’m sorry. I t-tried to get him to l-leave-” 

Jared plopped down on the couch and picked up a magazine that had been laying out.

“So, it’s fine when you hide things from me, but when I do it, you flip out and ignore me for days?” Connor’s voice started rising

No, you’re picking a fight with him. Don’t do this.

Evan cringed, “This is, this is...d-different?” he tried, twisting the front of his hoodie

Connor knew he shouldn’t be getting angry over this but…

“You are such a fucking liar! What else are you hiding from me, huh?”

His eyes widened and he puts his hands up in a placating gesture, “N-Nothing, I swear!”

Jared sighed and set down the magazine, “Dude, seriously, chill. We only hung out once before this when we bumped into each other. Can you like, not freak out and throw a fucking Murphy Tantrum?”

Fuming, Connor spun around to face him and he could have sworn Jared retreated into the couch a little.

“This is my home!” he screamed at him, “You aren’t welcome here!”

Jared frowned, “Wait...that’s it? That’s all you’re going to say? No abusive insults? You’re not gonna like, smash something?”

Connor clenched his fists, trying not to let the comment get to him, “I’ve been getting better!”

Was Connor the only person who thought he was improving? Did everyone else just see him as the old Connor Murphy? Did Evan see him like that?

“Sure,”

“N-No, it’s true, he has!” Evan’s voice insisted from behind him as he felt the shorter boy take his hand

Connor relaxed slightly before pulling away, “You know what. I have better things to do than worry about this shit. Do whatever you want, Evan.”

“Connor-”

“I don’t want to fight right now, Evan. Please, okay?”

“No, I think we should talk about this? I mean, I just feel like...something needs to be a-addressed?” 

Connor nodded reluctantly.

 

Eventually they got Jared to leave before they sat down at the table to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter is gonna be The Talk. lol thats not gonna go over well.  
> everyone in this needs a hug  
> jareds not actually that bad...okay yeah he is  
> sorry


	11. Stay With Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they try to talk things out...

They sat across from each other at the table in silence. Neither one said anything, just kept stealing quick glances back and forth. Eventually Connor cleared his throat to end the silence.

 

“So…” he started

 

Evan looked up and met his stare. 

 

“‘So…,’ what happened?”

 

“To…?” it was like trying to pull teeth with Evan

 

“To  _ us _ , Connor. What happened to  _ us _ ?”

 

There was a desperation in his eyes like he willing Connor to understand something that couldn’t be spoken. His eyes were shining, clearly trying to hold back tears.

 

Connor sighed, “I don’t know,” he admitted

 

Evan’s tears started dripping down his face as he cried soundlessly. Connor reached out and took his hands from across the table.

 

“Baby, no, don’t cry,”

 

Evan’s gaze dropped into his lap.

 

“Are we...did we just burn out?”

 

Connor tightened his grip on Evan’s hands instinctively,“No. No! Of course not. I’m never going to stop loving you, you’re  _ it  _ for me, Evan!”

 

Evan paused for a moment, “I think, maybe we need some space then,” he suggested hesitantly

 

Connor narrowed his eyes and drew back.“ _ Space _ ? We’ve been giving each other space for days! It isn’t working!”

 

“No...I-I think...I’m going to stay at Alana’s for awhile. I think we need a break,”

 

Connor stood up, staring at him with wide eye before his face grew hard. His eyes started stinging but he didn’t want to break down.

 

“Fine, yeah, go.” he gestured towards the door bitterly. 

 

His ears were ringing and his vision blurred slightly. He couldn’t do this right now. This wasn’t supposed to be a fight.

 

Evan stood up too,“Connor, it doesn’t have to be like that. It could be a  _ good  _ thing!”

 

Connor couldn’t stop his own tears and started to sob, “That’s what they always say, isn’t it? Before they break up?” he spat

 

“We’re not breaking up-”

 

“ _ Yet _ ! We’re not breaking up  _ yet _ . You’re just moving out ‘ _ temporarily’ _ . You  _ know _ that means it’s over!”

 

“That’s not true!” Evan protested

 

“Yes it  _ is _ ! Isn’t that what your dad did before he left?”

 

“This is different!”

 

“No it’s not! How is this any different! You’re going to leave me! I’m going to  _ lose  _ you!” he smacked his hand against the table

 

Evan dropped his voice, “Connie, no. You’re not going to lose me,”

 

He took a step closer but Connor backed away.

 

“Go! You don’t want me anymore!” he swiped a vase off the table, sending it crashing to the ground

 

Evan jumped “Connor, calm down, it’s okay. I won’t go anywhere if it’s going to upset you so much. I’m going to stay with you.”

 

But Connor was in hysterics, breathing rapidly.

 

“You’re gonna leave!” he shrieked as if he didn't hear what Evan just said

 

“ _ No! _ I’m right here! Look at me!”

 

Connor refused to meet his eye so Evan moved closer and cupped his face, turning him.

 

“Connor, breathe.” he said softly before he wrapped his arms around the taller boy

 

But Connor shoved him away harshly. Evan flinched and let out a yelp but Connor just stormed towards the door.

 

“W-Where are y-y-you going?” he asked timidly, not following Connor

 

Connor knew his anxiety was making a reappearance and he knew he caused that.

 

“Out!” he threw open the door and walked out

 

“W-Wait-” he was cut off as the door slammed shut behind him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry...  
> yeah, Connor's definitely got some abandonment issues  
> Can we talk about the fact that be more chill is gonna be made into a movie??


	12. Revolutions 101

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connor loves to read. He's just shit at returning his library books.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo...it's been a hot minute. I'm really sorry about that. I'll try to be updating more.

Connor stormed out, leaving Evan alone. As he fled the building, his mind kept replaying the fight. He’d scared Evan again. He put his hands on him in a way he swore he’d never do again, even if Evan hadn’t been hurt from it. His anger got the best of him.

 

Connor marched down the street. It was late. Not too many people were out. He wasn’t in the mood to fight with Valerian so he just kept walking until he reached a coffee shop a few streets down.

 

He took a deep breath before entering. The shop was empty, save the barista. 

 

Connor approached her.

 

“Hi, what can I get you tonight?” She smiled brightly but Connor could see the tiredness behind it.

 

“Just a green tea, medium,” he grumbled

 

“Will that be all?” The barista- Catherine, her name tag said, asked.

 

Connor looked up at the menu, “And a large hot chocolate,” he added, hoping Evan would enjoy it.

 

Catherine got to work immediately on the drinks since there was nobody else working.

 

“So did you see that fight with Valerian and Snapwire?” she asked, making conversation as she poured the tea into a cup.

 

“Yeah,” he said

 

“It really makes you wonder about family of people getting locked up. Not that I’m defending Snapwire or anything.”

 

Connor didn’t need to respond because she’d handed him the two drinks.

 

“Thanks.” he walked out.

 

“Have a nice-”

 

The door shut on her mid sentence. Connor didn’t bother to go back and apologize.

  
  


He opened the apartment door. Evan was curled up on the couch. He’d changed into one of Connor’s hoodies and had the hood pulled up, covering his eyes. He was clinging to the fabric as if it was Connor.

 

Connor approached him slowly. 

 

“I got you a hot chocolate.” he said with a nervous smile.

 

Evan didn’t move or even reveal his face. Was he asleep?

 

Connor cautiously touched his arm. Evan took a deeper breath. 

 

“Baby?”

 

He didn’t get a response. He kneeled down in front of the couch, setting the drinks down on the coffee table. 

 

“Baby, please look at me.” Connor turned Evan’s chin to face him and pulled the hood down gently.

 

He was expecting Evan’s eyes to be red and puffy but they weren’t. They were completely dry and normal. They were just...empty, as if all of his pain was somewhere else. What had Connor done to him?

 

_ Connor shoved the copy of  _ Revolutions 101  _ back at her. _

 

_ “I need it for a research  project!” Connor started to get frustrated with the school librarian.  _

 

_ “I’m sorry,” She said in a calm voice, “But you have too many late fees. You haven’t returned any of your books yet-” _

_ “Can’t you just make an exception?” he growled. _

 

_ “If you just return those books, I’d be happy to let you check this one out.” The librarian forced a smile. _

 

_ Connor had no idea where any of those books were. He’d lost them all throughout the year, but he needed this book for a research assignment in English class.  _

 

_ He tried to control his anger. Why couldn’t this lady understand that he  _ needed  _ this book? _

 

_ “I-If you want, I could, um, you could check it on my account?” A timid voice said. _

 

_ Connor turned around to see Evan Hansen- the boy he shoved at the beginning of the year. He had his cast removed now but there was still a small tanline left behind.  _

 

_ “It’s just, I-I don’t have any books due back for another few weeks is the thing.” he continued quickly went Connor didn’t say anything. _

 

_ “You’d do that for me?” he raised his eyebrow. _

 

_ Evan gave him a small nod and pulled out his student I.D., handing it to the librarian. She didn’t argue and scanned Connor’s book before handing it to him. _

 

_ Connor took it slowly, still shocked at this kid’s kindness.  _

 

_ “...Thanks.” _

 

_ “It’s due back in four weeks, Mr. Murphy.” The librarian gave him a pointed look. _

 

_ Connor rolled his eyes and walked out without another word. He wasn’t going to lose a book on Evan’s account. He’d take special care of it. _

 

Connor took Evan’s hand and stroked it with his thumb. 

 

“Baby, please...don’t give me those eyes.” he begged.

 

Evan chewed on his lip nervously.

 

He thought for a moment. “Let’s do something this week. Something special, just the two of us.” he suggested.

 

Evan shrugged.

 

“C’mon, baby, it’ll be fun! I’ll...I’ll look up somewhere to go, okay?”

 

Evan sighed, “Okay.” he nodded.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear it won't be so long of a wait for the next chapter. I'm gonna try to work on this again. My mental health has been shit though which is why I'd put the story on pause. Anxiety is just...it sucks. In case you were wondering about why Evan's anxiety is written the way it is, it's cause it's based off of my own. Hehhhh...yeah, okay sorry.

**Author's Note:**

> Leave comments and kudos. They give me validation. Also I love to hear what you think. Like I literally don't know anything without feedback. I'm also open to plot suggestions cause I love hearing your ideas.
> 
> I'm writing a one-shots series so leave me prompts with the pairing of your choosing!


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